Valentine’s Day. The day when love is in the air and everything is red and pink and heart-shaped all over (just a few of my favourite things). Despite liking things associated with this holiday, I usually don’t take it very seriously. I’m not a cynic who demonizes companies like Hallmark for capitalizing on the hearts (and wallets) of the lovesick to make big bucks, but I personally don’t find much use nor pleasure in a day that’s not even considered a stat holiday (call me when its Christmastime). But this year, I actually have something to say.
On the flip side of the touching declarations of love I’ve seen in the weeks leading up to Valentine’s Day, my single friends are feeling glum over its impending approach (of doom). Seeing my friends upset makes me upset too. I long for the elementary school days when you were forced to give everyone in your class a valentine so that nobody gets left out. But as adults, loneliness and heartbreak is just part of the game of love and life.
How do people typically respond when people are down over Valentine’s Day?
“You’ll find someone soon!“
Soon? Are you a psychic? How soon is soon? There’s really no secret recipe to finding “the one”. Unless you’ve been lucky enough to stay together with your childhood sweetheart for all these years, it is a matter of trial and error with heartbeats and heartaches (rinse and repeat). When you’re forced to observe the parade of blissfully happy couples celebrating their love for one another, of course you’re going to feel bummed out and anxious over when you’ll be the one on the receiving end of these gestures of affection. I wish I had an answer for this one, but love is the greatest mystery of life. Where’s Sherlock Holmes when you need him?
“There are worse things happening in the world!”
We are fully aware of all the terrible injustices occurring around the world, but this is a disparate comparison, and that doesn’t make a person’s feelings any less valid. Don’t let anyone shame you for having these very real, very human emotions.
“Aw, cheer up!”
Aw, hell no! Ignore them and listen to me. It’s okay. It’s okay to feel sad or mad. It’s okay to have a pity party. If it helps you release your stream of tears or steam of fury, you damn well should. Go on and cry into your pillow or throw that pillow across the room (just be careful of fragile objects, please). And by God, eat that entire tub of chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream if it makes you feel better.
I always joke about my aspirations to become a cat lady (you may laugh now, but wait until you see my army of laser cats in the year 2030). But in honour of my resolution to wear my heart on my sleeve a little more, I must confess – I’m still holding onto that dream of finding Prince Charming. Now don’t start calling me a hopeless romantic or anything. I just would like for someone special to surprise me with a bouquet of roses, and I often wonder how much longer I have to wait for that to happen. I ain’t getting any younger here.
I guess the point I want to get across here is this: you are not the only one in the lonely hour out here. You have company in the Lonely Hearts Club, and despite ridin’ solo, each and every one of us in this bunch is an awesome catch in our own unique way. And even if there’s no romantic love in your life right at this moment, there is still all kinds of love in your life – the love of your family, the love of your friends, the love you have for yourself. So while you wait for Cupid to aim his arrow your way, try surrounding yourself with these other forms of love and do the things you love. You may be surprised at how much warmer and lighter you feel. And on those days when you just want to listen to sad songs and sob in your room, by all means, play on. Your true blue loves will be there for you.
To all of you lonely yet beautiful hearts, I hope you’ll find love in a hopeless place (thanks, RiRi). In the meantime, don’t forget to indulge in the one good thing we can all agree on regarding Valentine’s Day – the half-priced candies and chocolates on February 15th. #TreatYoSelf2015
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